My Dad is Full

I hid in the pink-tan curtains dipped in cigarette smoke
eyes squeezed to the smell. If my cousins found me
they would uncover me, reveal me, beat me.
I heard them laugh down the green carpet hallway.

The speech of my family is dirty dishes in the sink or
green and peach bathroom over sprayed with Glade.
Quiero hablar como mis primos and be loved for the
greasy milk that I am. Hide and seek is bilingual.

Nani says if we stay outside we can each have
a Nutty Buddy from the freezer in the cuartito
-when translated means oily red door, naked framing,
straw booms, and in rare cases, ice cream.

Closets that stay warm in the fall are words
stored in the dark coarse hair of el bigote de mi padre.
They work as una prima que sabe: I want as opposed
to you want. I grow blonde hair and mi abuelo me llame
guero with the rattle of brandy in his throat.

Rakes and shovels in the truck
estan una dia tipica en el calor de verano
and I am a vaquero en las calles.
Sudor son bilingüe.

bio picture

Isaac Banegas
malcontent, dusty, intentional.